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Sunday, August 4, 2013

Attempts at Mitigation

Unlike passive-aggressive sexual anger, aggressive behavior is direct and may include intimidation, threats, and physical and emotional aggression. Rape, sexual incest, and molestation are the most extreme expressions of sexual anger. These extreme violations, however, are more the exception than the rule for most sexually compulsive individuals. For most sexual addicts, aggressive sexual anger, masked by the sexual objectification of self or others, serves to divert painful awareness from the objectifier's shame.

Take, for example, Max, who pursues an inappropriate sexual relationship with a subordinate at work. Or Jill, who becomes a dominatrix so she can role-play torture or degradation of herself or her tricks. Or Milton, who spends hours each day downloading pornography onto his computer and masturbating.  All of these are overt aggressive behaviors that attempt to mitigate shame and pain.

A more convoluted manner of mitigating shame and pain combines passive-aggressive anger with aggressive anger.

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